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NGƯNG SO SÁNH CON TRẺ (DÙ KHEN HAY CHÊ)

🚨NGƯNG SO SÁNH CON TRẺ (DÙ KHEN HAY CHÊ)🚨

Mọi người vẫn thường nghĩ bởi vì quan tâm mới đưa ra những lời Khen (Chê) và những câu nói đó chỉ đơn giản là những câu nói thoảng qua. Nhưng hậu quả thật sự mà nó mang lại không hề đơn giản.

👉”Chỉ mất vài giây để đưa ra một lời phán xét – Nhưng đọng lại bao dằn vặt và tổn thương cho cả bé và gia đình các em”

🐣Mỗi đứa trẻ sinh ra đều là mỗi cá thể riêng, có tính cách bản chất riêng, có sở thích, năng lực riêng… có bé phát triển tốt về mặt này, có bé phát triển tốt về mặt khác. Không có một Quy Chuẩn Hoàn Hảo nào Đủ để So Sánh, để Áp Đặt!!!

Ví dụ một đứa bé sinh ra có thiên hướng nghệ thuật, có nhiều tài năng sáng tạo nghệ thuật, không để so sánh là thua kém một đứa bé học bác sĩ hay kỹ sư được. Vì chúng hoàn toàn khác nhau

👉Nhớ lại xem,
– Bạn có từng trốn vào góc phòng ngồi khóc lóc, ấm ức, tủi thân, khi bị mọi người so sánh với anh chị em trong nhà không? Cảm giác ấy thế nào?

– Bạn có từng ghét cực ghét cái đứa “con nhà người ta” dù chưa một lần gặp mặt, chỉ vì bị ba mẹ so sánh với nó không?

– Bạn có từng có nhiều dự định hay ho trong cuộc sống muốn chia sẻ với ba mẹ nhưng rồi lại thôi, bỏ lỡ cơ hội vì suy nghĩ “bản thân không thể làm được đâu” không?

👄So Sánh Con Trẻ Có Hai Hướng : BỊ CHÊ Hoặc ĐƯỢC KHEN !

Đều không mang lại lợi ích gì mà chỉ gây áp lực không tốt đến trẻ, kìm hãm năng lực vốn có của trẻ. Ảnh hưởng tâm lý đến cả tương lai lâu dài.

Gây ra sự đố kỵ lẫn nhau, dẫn đến mối quan hệ không tốt giữa các trẻ, hay ba mẹ của các trẻ bị so sánh. Đánh mất mối quan hệ tốt đẹp vốn có.

Trẻ bị so sánh, chê bai : sẽ làm trẻ bị áp lực, tự ti hơn về bản thân, có tâm lý thua thiệt, luôn nghĩ bản thân mình kém cỏi, không làm được gì, cũng không muốn làm gì vì cảm thấy nổ lực bao nhiêu cũng không được công nhận, sinh tính rụt rè, hay lo sợ, đánh mất giá trị vốn có của bản thân.

Trẻ bị so sánh, khen nhiều : sẽ làm trẻ cao ngạo, thiếu phấn đấu, nghĩ mình là cái rốn vũ trụ, coi thường người khác, khó phát triển vì cái tôi lớn không chịu học hỏi, khó làm được việc lớn, không hiểu được rằng núi cao còn có núi cao hơn, dễ bị shock, áp lực lớn hơn khi gặp chuyện thua kém người khác, đánh mất giá trị vốn có của bản thân.

Ba mẹ khi thường xuyên so sánh con sẽ tạo khoảng cách lớn giữa ba mẹ và con trẻ, vì con không cảm nhận được sự thấu hiểu của ba mẹ, sẽ cảm thấy cô đơn, lạc lõng trong chính gia đình, gây nhiều cảm xúc tiêu cực và ảnh hưởng đến cả tương lai về sau.

Thay vì so sánh thì hãy động viên trẻ, biết khen chê thưởng phạt đúng lúc, hãy hiểu đúng khả năng của trẻ, lợi thế của trẻ (mình chắc rằng mỗi người sinh ra đều có một khả năng nào đó, chỉ cần biết cách khai thác và động viên đúng cách thì sẽ mang lại hiệu quả tích cực). Lời động viên mang năng lượng rất lớn, tạo sức mạnh giúp cho trẻ có thể tự tin hơn, khẳng định và phát triển được bản thân. Lời khen chê hay thưởng phạt đúng lúc sẽ tạo động lực tích cực giúp con hiểu hơn và phấn đấu mỗi ngày. Chỉ được so sánh con với con của ngày hôm nay.

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